A New Desire
by Crystalloides
Summary: A broken man with no hope left, lost in thought at a hot windy day, precisely May 3rd. With no loved ones left except a handful, nothing to distract himself from the guilt inside that was tearing him apart, he finally realizes that he couldn't rest until he sees the desire, just one last time. His parents are still there, but his desire changed. Harry Potter can't throw rocks now.


The hot winds of May did nothing to ease my pain, nothing to shield me and chase the feeling of guilt and despair stabbing at me like a cold, metal dagger away. So what if Voldemort was gone? What did it matter? Tears were building in my eyes, but I held them back. My cloak covered my face and body, but I still held them back. I wrapped myself tighter, feeling cold winds slapping my face every second instead of warm air comforting me. It did no good to dwell in the past, but I couldn't stop. Was there a point in living? No, there wasn't. I walked slowly to the room beside me as I stopped gazing outside the open window. James Potter smiled at me and motioned for me to sit down. I returned the smile and sat down the chair opposite James.

You would've thought my dead father appearing out of nowhere would've surprised me, but nothing shocks me anymore. I lost many things in two hours, just two hours, I lost my life, I lost myself. My mother appeared too. She waved at me. I waved back.

They cannot talk, I knew that, so I did the talking for them. I waited for any interaction, but all my mother and father did was wave and blow kisses. Harry knew it wasn't them right then, and he grabbed a jagged stone and threw it at the mirror. The Mirror of Erised shattered, and I slid down the nearest wall, and the tears I stopped overflew and broke the dam I built. My walls were crumbling, I didn't have the strength to go on. I watched as the Mirror repaired itself, and now, Sirius was standing there with them, mocking me. Sirius, James and Lily were staring at him with sadness, tears streaming from their eyes to their faces too. I grabbed the box of jagged stones I prepared and began throwing it at the mirror, watching it break and repair itself. Lily sobbed, although I couldn't hear anything, her head rested on James' shoulder, and Sirius stood beside James, furiously wiping the tears that spilled from his eyes. It was the same scene, all over, it broke and repaired... broke and repaired... broke and repaired...

The box was empty. I buried my head between my knees, racked sobs echoing in the room, three meters away from his greatest desire. So near, yet so far...

I gave up, and just punched the mirror. Blood oozed out of my fist, and Lily's sobs were soon joined by James and Sirius's. Soon enough, Remus appeared. Eyes bloodshot and shaking his head at my direction. The mirror repaired itself, but I conjured another box of jagged stones, sat down and started firing again... and again... and again...

The desire changed.

A different person stood in the middle of the four, laughing, so tempting... He had black, messy hair and bright emerald eyes, at least as tall as James Potter. All his four companions's eyes widened, and began shaking their heads furiously, waving their hands in a warning way. I smiled, I knew what my desire meant. I stood up, a mad gleam in my eyes. I got a dagger from my belt and held it high, where I gently placed the tip on my chest. Two more people showed up, eyes widened, imitating the other four's moves, while the messy-haired, emerald-eyed person stood there, laughing.

Jealousy sprang into him like a spider weaving a web ten times faster. It creeped under his skin. The two people, Ron and Hermione had began stomping their feet. Hermione's warm brown eyes were red.

I pushed.

I lay dead on the floor, the Mirror of Erised looking back at my dead body, blank. My eyesight has gone berserk, I closed my eyes.

That was how the rest of the Wizarding World found Harry James Evans Potter. All the tears of what was left of the Weasley family and Hogwarts Staff and Students fell on the floor. Call Harry selfish, but that was the only time he did something for himself. The first and the last time he will do something for himself, because he had left.

**Ron, Hermione, Remus, Tonks, Hedwig, Mad-Eye, all the Weasleys except for Charlie and Percy, Dursleys, Lavendar Brown, Patil twins, Creeveys, Dumbledore, Sirius, Cedric, Cho, Terry Boot, Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, McGonnagal, Slughorn, Snape and Flitwick died. **


End file.
